Hunted By My Shadows

It has been over a month since I sat down to let the words flow through me. Many times (nearly 100%) when I sit down to write it is because I have a topic that is asking to be written. Since the end of January I have not had that-so I thought, I must not have anything to write. When in fact I just have been to afraid to give myself the space-to sit down and just ask, what needs to be written today?

There are a few projects I am working on birthing, to live here, in the 3D world. It is an entire re-routing of my life to be much more creative and living in the unknown. I am allowing myself to be redefined in how I exist in the world. I think what I have been experiencing is an ego death-some of the monsters that have crawled out of my psyche have done an earnest job of trying to scare into remaining as I always have.

One project I am developing is an audio series (stay tuned in the coming weeks about what this will be!!) and I was working on the interview schedule. When out of some dark cesspool came, what if this isn't interesting? Again, my fear/ego, word vomiting to keep me small. I know where this comes from, I know the old coping tool where this technique lives to maintain a perception of safety. Don't be noticed and you can't get hurt. The last month I have been swimming in questions like the one above. You may recognize some yourself; How will you make enough money, what if someone else could write it better, what if no one comes, you are too lazy to do all these creative projects, who are you to..., you don't know enough, you're a fraud, this is all a fantasy, this is too scary. Have you heard any of these in your life?

Sometimes they are scary enough that we chose to stay small. Lordess knows I have considered it a couple of times. OK fine-more than a couple. But I am here and I am doing it! Perhaps this was what needed to be written today so that I could formally declare that, I chose inspiration, I chose creativity, I chose the path that is so unknown my brain can't fill in the blanks. It is time- I am ready to be seen-to be witnessed!

I am going to have some REALLY exciting updates for you all soon! Be sure to subscribe so that you are the 1st to find out! Thank you from the bottom of my heart for being with me on this journey!